No Sugar Week 1- Done!

Well, I finally made it! When I first thought of going a week without sugar, I thought it would be hard, that I'd be dying for chocolate or unable to enjoy unsweetened coffee.

But, I did it!

OK- I did have 2 glasses of wine on Friday and two more on Saturday. Eh. I'm still calling it a success. And I'm still riding that wave of positivity. What other differences have there been? Not too many, but I'll tell you anyway.

1) My "digestive system has been, shall we say, busier. Not wanting to get into any details, I've been going to the bathroom a bit more often than before. 'Nuff said.

2) I've been feeling "friskier." Again, not to get too personal but I do want to make note of this for myself at least. I think Froody has noticed and responded. ;-)

3) Not sleeping as well. It's been taking me longer to fall asleep and then I wake up in the middle of the night and it takes a while to all asleep again. :(

I talked to my trainer about the sleep problem and he suggested I give it three weeks. That should give my body a chance to readjust to the new sugar-free diet. I'm not entirely sugar-free. Some nights I've chosen to consume two ounces of fruit. Believe me...I savor every little bite.

Oh, and, yeah, I'm going another week without sugar.

NO SUGAR- DAY 3

In case you forgot, this is the band Sugar Ray. "Every morning there's a halo hanging from the corner of my girlfriend's four-post bed."

OK. As you know, I've been trying to do two things: Follow the Primal Diet and Lose This Friggin' Weight. Again.

According to the PD, if you consume between 50-100g of carbohydrates a day, you should easily and effortlessly lose weight. So began my month-and-a-half long journey of weighing and measuring everything. Which I did. And I was good about it; just ask Froody.

Well, I didn't really lose any weight. OK- I lost 3 lbs for all that effort. Not the 8-10 that the PD leads you to believe. So, like any other normal, American woman... I got desperate.

Just how desperate????

So desperate that I figured I needed to be eating less than 50g of carbs a day. Like 30-40g. But, I didn't want to eat any less than I'm already eating. (Seriously- measuring out 1/3c of mushrooms or 2 oz of chicken per meal is kinda depressing.)

So desperate that I chose (ugh) to stop. eating. sugar. *groan* And wine. *gasp* And chocolate. *sob*

I KNOW. I KNOW. As a normal, American woman that's unthinkable. Especially since I only used 1 3/4 tsp in my coffee (morning and afternoon). And I would only eat 1 square of extra dark chocolate most nights. And I would only have 4 oz of red wine at night. (Yeah, when you pour wine into a Pyrex measuring cup and then into a wine glass, a lot of the romance goes away.)

But, let me reiterate: I. AM. DESPERATE. And I decided that cutting out those things would accomplish 2 good things: 1) I'd finally be strict PD and 2) I'd be cutting out 14-24g of carbs per day.

So that's what I did on Tuesday. I figured I'd give it a week and then reassess.

Now that it's Day 3 I have to say that so far, everything is pretty OK. I actually like unsweetened iced tea. Unsweetened iced coffee isn't that bad, either. I haven't heard the chocolate sitting in my fridge calling my name, either. But do you want to know the weirdest and strangest thing to happen since I stopped eating sugar?

Those negative voices inside my head have stopped. My self-esteem has climbed and my attitude is pretty positive. I know, I know...this sounds crazy. But I did come across an article that says there has been some research that suggests link between sugar and depression and anxiety. Obviously, there are all sorts of variables at work here, but I felt so good yesterday that it made me wonder. Some of you don't know this, but depression (and addiction) seem to run in my family. What if my body is just hyper-sensitive to sugar? Or, with my decreased carb-intake, the relatively high percentage of sugar was messin' me up?

Anyway, I'll continue to monitor myself. If there really is a link between sugar and feeling "happy", it may make giving up these things a bit easier to do.

Still Counting

Well, one and a half months in and I'm still weighing and measuring. Go me!

Have I lost 25lbs? Gone down several dress sizes? Full of vim and vigor???

Sadly, the answer is no.

But wait! I have noticed changes in my behavior towards food, and that's what I want to tell you. It'll be good for me so that I don't focus on what isn't happening.

1. Tummy talk- This time around, I realized that I use to my mouth or eyes and not my stomach to determine whether or not I'm full or satisfied. My mouth tells me how tasty something is and how it's a shame to not finish it, because who knows when I'll have it again? Then, my eyes notice how there's not that much left on my plate, so go ahead...finish it. Now, I've decided to give my stomach a good listen and if it says it's full, then I stop. At first this was hard, because, hey, who doesn't like to eat tasty food? But it's gotten easier.

2. Make it a choice- Not only am I tuning in to my stomach, but I'm putting a positive spin on this Primal Diet. I tell myself that, really, I can eat ANYTHING I want (chocolate, pasta, beer...) but I CHOOSE not to. It's my decision. That has really made a difference. I'd rather eat something (or not eat it) because I want to, not because I feel like I have to.

3. It's smaller!- OK, I'm not talking about my pants-size. I'm talking about portion size. You know, I really don't need to eat big meals anymore. Even with WeightWatchers, I'd eat large portions. I could stretch a "point" like you wouldn't believe! But on PD it's not points but grams of carbs and proteins, and sadly, I can't fudge those. :( To my surprise, that's OK because I'm ....

4. Less hungry- My trainer asked me if I felt hungry during this past month, and that's when I realized I didn't. Three meals a day and one snack is all I need, amazingly enough. I used to need to eat more often, snacking in the mornings and evenings, grazing in the afternoons. For me, a snack is a cup of coffee with cream and 1 3/4 tsp sugar and a hardboiled egg. Or an ounce of almonds. Sometimes my mouth wants to chew on "something", even if I'm not hungry. I try to drink water at those times.

Alright, body! Seems my brain is adjusting to these diet changes. Now it's time for you to drop some lbs. Pretty please. :)

Weights and Measures

bleh. As a lot of you know, I've been trying to lose weight for ever. Seriously. For a while now I've been half-heartedly following several diet tenets. Of course, that approach doesn't work. At least, not for me.

So it's back to focusing on one diet- the Primal Diet. What I like about the PD is that it's about eating food that's real food, not processed and full of bad chemicals. It means only consuming a certain amount of carbohydrates and proteins. That, in turn, means breaking out my trusty collection of measuring spoons and measuring cups, my food scale, and the Internet.

Part of me balks at all this fuss. It takes the fun out of eating. I can no longer just grab some of this and a handful of that and put it in my mouth. :( I have to actually think about what I'm about to eat. :-o

But, another part of me is all for it. At least when I'm measuring out an ounce of nuts, researching how many carbs are in 3 grape tomatoes, and deciding how many ounces of steak will give me 23g of protein I feel like I'm doing something towards losing this weight. It forces me to take control of this part of my life. I know that someday (next week? tomorrow?) I'm going to curse at my measuring equipment but right now it feels pretty good. Besides, I've already 1.5 lbs since I started 2 days ago, and that's very encouraging!

Is It Just Me???

While wandering around the internet I found an ad for Bonobos which looks like a fancy-pants men's store. It's got pics of good-looking guys in khakis and polo shirts, posing in expensive flip-flops.

But when I think of bonobos, I think of chimps. Seriously, doesn't everyone think of monkeys when they hear that word? Why would you name your male shi-shi company after a bunch of chimpanzees? Maybe it's just me, but the word "bonobo" does not make me think of adventures with a man wearing madras shorts. It makes me think of the only non-human animal that has face-to-face sex.

hmmmm.....sex.... Maybe the company's PR people did know what they were doing.

New Beginnings

"It's hard to think about your life when one life is made up of so many lifetimes."

Or something like that. I remember a friend of mine said this once. It made a lot of sense when I was 25. I was on life #3 or 4 by then, and I thought that was a lot!

Anyway, I just wanted to tell you all that I have decided to change my life. I am leaving teaching (for now? for good?). I am a good teacher, but it has been very stressful. To be a good teacher you need to invest a lot of yourself, heart and soul, into your lessons, school, and students. After my year off and my year back in the classroom, I've discovered that I don't have much to give anymore. Even less to bring to my relationship with Froody. He's the main reason I've chosen to change careers. For 9.5 months I'm too tired to go camping, hiking, even out to dinner with family and friends. It would be so nice to be able to do all those things I like doing- alone and with Froody- for more than just 2.5 months out of the year.

Now is a good time to leave. Teachers seem to be coming under fire in this country. Even my current good and supportive district is planning on increasing class-size to 34 (hell, who wants to be locked in a room full of 13 year olds all day everyday for 9 months!?), not give us the next step in pay, and add more "furlough" days (no school = no work = no pay). Not only that, but did you hear about the school that fired all their teachers because the kids aren't scoring well?? True, I think teachers do need to be accountable, but so do the students, parents, and school district. How can the government expect me to teach these kids when they keep giving me less and less $$ and resources to do my job??? How can I teach these kids when their parents are unable or do not want to be positive contributors to their students' education?

bleh. I'd rather be an animal nurse.

End chapter 8. Start chapter 9.

Farewell, Tastebuds

As you know, all year I've been trying to follow a more healthy diet. With such a reduction in processed foods and grains, I thought I'd treat myself today with a diet coke and a bag of popcorn at the movies. (!) I also brought a small bag of nuts and my sister brought a bag of carrots. We had all the bases covered.

So, I buy a small bag of popcorn. With butter. Can you smell it? mmMMmm.... I'm so looking forward to this!!!...

Anyway, I sit down and have a kernal. then another. and another. Eventually, I put the bag down and reach for my sister's carrots and the bag of nuts. I was ssssooooo disappointed! I think after months of no grains my tastebuds have changed. The popcorn was OK, but I couldn't even finish it, not even with my sister's help. :(

*sigh* I used to derive so much pleasure from foods. They were my greatest comfort. Now it feels as if they are deserting me. Or, perhaps, I'm learning to live without them.